Finding our wholeness: balancing polarities in inner parts work

As it’s the first week after the equinox, I’ve been reflecting on the wisdom of balancing opposing energies in our lives.

This world births itself out of the creative tension between polarities: Light and dark. Inner and outer. Joy and pain. Self and Other.

Here’s the thing: Duality is beautiful and necessary. But if we get caught in it - if we see the world as ultimately either/or, black/white, good/bad, if we believe it’s all there is... then we don’t step onto our evolutionary path towards relational consciousness. 

Relational consciousness is expanded consciousness; it has room for more than one truth. It welcomes multiplicities. And, consequently, it gives us more choice, power, and freedom. Relationality can participate in the dance of opposites without getting stuck in one or the other. If we can harness the creative tension of polarities without identifying with either side, then we have access to our power as conscious co-creators of reality.

One thing that gets in the way of us accessing this power: the imbalanced relationships inside ourselves. We identify with certain parts that we like and disown others we don’t. We hunger for more lightness, so we hide our darkness. Or throw it away. Or project it onto others. 

Trouble is, that doesn’t work.

What is oppressed and exiled rises up to create havoc a thousand-fold later on, whether its inside us or in the outer world.

We need an approach that is anchored in wholeness and relationality to be able to heal. One practice to do this is to reflect on and facilitate balance between our conflicting inner parts.

Below are a few reflection questions to get you started:

  • Which parts of you do you like, celebrate, cherish?

  • Which parts of you do you dislike, disown, deny? 

  • Which parts act consciously, and which parts react unconsciously?

  • What beliefs do you hold about these different parts, and who taught you them?

  • Which beliefs are serving you, and which are not?

  • What might happen if you were to relate to all your different parts with compassion

  • What might happen if you befriended your exiled parts?

If you want to go deeper with this work and would like some accompaniment, send me a message and tell me what you’re noticing and what you’d like help exploring! It’s one of my biggest passions to guide my clients to explore and heal with this “inner parts” work!